We never know for sure how things will turn out in life and if you’re a pessimist, you’ll be pretty certain it won’t be good!
Maybe you’re the classic glass half empty pessimist: If you expect the worst and then it doesn’t happen, that’s great. But if the worst does actually happen, you will then have the satisfaction of being right in the first place, so nothing’s lost.
Perhaps you just think you are unlucky. That it’s all out of your control…It’s someone else’s fault…You just couldn’t have made any difference to the outcome…Bad stuff ‘always happens’ to you…
By having the mindset that nothing ever goes right for you, research has shown that this actually increases the number of negative outcomes in your life.
Professor Richard Wiseman (1), a University of Hertfordshire psychologist has discovered why ‘unlucky’ people who always expect the worst have a tough time and why ‘lucky’ people, who always expect a positive outcome, get more out of life. (1)Wiseman Study
He discovered that so called ‘lucky’ people create their own good luck through 4 basic principles:
- They are able to create or notice chance opportunities
- They create positive self fulfilling prophesies through positive expectations
- They make ‘lucky’ decisions by listening to their intuition or ‘gut feeling’
- They have a resilient attitude to life, that transforms ‘bad luck’ into good, they can turn things around
Through his research, he showed that a pessimist consistently misses positive opportunities, even when they are staring them in the face. It is like they have blinkers on to good opportunities or they just tune them out or briefly consider them and then reject them. Their perception of the world is robbing them of opportunities that are just plain obvious to the optimist!
And living life as a pessimist, can establish a low mood and levels of anxiety about ‘what could go wrong’. This helps to keep them firmly in their familiar comfort zone of restriction and fear.
Unfortunately, the comfort zone of a pessimist is not a comfortable one. It is restrictive, devoid of colour and excitement. Opportunities in life that can help them to grow and nourish their soul are allowed to pass by or quickly turned down.
Learning how not to be a pessimist
Thank goodness, it is just your view of the world as a pessimist that goes against you. Because no matter what life influences and experiences have moulded you into a pessimist, it is still possible to cultivate an optimistic outlook. You can learn how to expect a better and more positive life experience.
And yes, it will involve steeping outside of your familiar comfort zone sometimes. But the more you do so and seeing positive results, will make it easier the next time. You will then cultivate a new comfort zone. One with movable boundaries. A comfort zone of possibilities, where the edge of ‘scariness’ will begin to feel like excitement instead. You can open the cell door of that pessimistic prison cell and step right out into the possibilities of a more fulfilling life!
Imagine how much better that will feel? Imagine how your life will begin to change as you participate more? Perhaps you can fulfil that long held dream that you always thought was impossible. Even if you ‘fail’ at an opportunity, you can learn and grow from that and try again or have a go at something different. In NLP, we say there is no such thing as failure, only feedback. Fear of Failure
Being comfortable with uncertainty is the key here, feeling the fear and doing it anyway!
In the words of James Baldwin the American writer:
“Those who say it can’t be done are usually interrupted by others doing it…”
Through hypnosis and NLP, you can overcome negative learned behaviour and change your mindset. You will be able to start to take your blinkers off and open your eyes to opportunities around you for a more fulfilling and dare I say it, exciting life!